I'd Like to Apologize in Advance for this Post

this post is a mature situation

you've been warned


So, I was having a cocktail on a patio with a friend of mine

I won't use her name due to the content of this story

we're at a bar and grill drinking rum and cokes

the conversation turns to the subject of the guy she's sleeping with at the time

she tells me that he likes to play with her ass

she looks at me and I take a sip from my rum and coke

she goes on to say that he likes to stick his finger in her asshole

I put my drink down on the table

I'm listening and still holding onto my drink

she goes on to tell me that she sees him smell his finger after it's been in her ass

she doesn't think he knows she's seen him do that

I take another drink from my rum and coke

she goes on to say that because she knows he likes ass play

she makes sure to wash her ass good

I finish the rest of my drink

she says that her asshole is so clean it whistles

I put my empty drink down after a quick second

and tell her, " You got it all wrong. I don't think he wants your ass so clean. I mean c'mon he's fingering your shitter, do you think he wants his finger to smell like a summer's breeze." " He's probably gonna dump you. He's gonna say, 'It's not working out. Your ass just doesn't smell like shit.'" (you guys notice the dreaded quote inside a quote?)

I then call for the nurse and order another drink