A Good, Ol' Fashion

Hold on

I haven't written a good old fashion blog in a while


ok first off, I've been told by people that I hang out with

that the drunker I get

the deeper in the chair I sit

I've even told stories about how I was, "deep in my chair"

well, I've always wanted a nice leather chair

my folks bought me one for my birthday

so now this is my chair in the den

I can see myself sitting DEEP in this chair

So, I just got back from Austin

I was visiting my brother, Sharpie

one thing Sharpie does that I love is he finds spots or drinks or things that he knows that I would appreciate

so he had a few lined up for me

and he was right again

one thing in particular he wanted me to try was a mint julep

I've never had one, and was pretty stoked about it

so we hit up a bar on the east side of Austin

the east side is accused of being a little too "hipster" for some people's tastes

I don't really mind hipsters

they make me look tough

and no matter how stupid I act, I'm not the most ridiculous thing in the bar

so we go to the East Side Show Room bar

it's got this whole steel, retro, nautical, sailor, Hawaii theme going for it

it was a pretty slow night and it was full of hipsters

most of them were the staff there

they were all mostly sitting right at the bar

anyway, we get our first round and pick a seat in the corner 

the drink was as I said at the time," out of this world"

Sharpie and I sit and enjoy yet another great night out

the bar is playing old fashion ukulele music

and I notice a couple dancing in the middle of the bar

we order another round

Sharpie gets up and goes to the restroom

at this point we're both pretty hammered after 3 hours of Raw and beer

and a few rounds in an Elvis bar

so, I'm there sitting deep in my chair when I look over at the dancing couple behind me

it's just a quick glance to my left

I've got my back to the wall

they're standing now and the guy is holding the girl by the arms

both of their arms are outstretched

all of a sudden the guy lets her go

she falls straight back

she hits the back of her head on a table directly behind her

then falls under it

knocking the candles off and making a noise like somebody dropped a pile of plates

the guy is freaking out

the girl is stunned

the guy quickly picks her up

and apologizes to her

you can tell she's embarrassed as fuck

then the guy looks over at the bar and says very desperately, "it was a joke, I'm sorry, it was supposed to be a joke..."

kinda like, "oh god, don't you guys come over here and restore her honor by kicking my ass."

the bar of hipsters just looks at him with no response or any type of menace or malice

I mean Hell, one of them was a he-she for Christ's sake

he's hugging her now and then glances over at me

who's actually at this point the only person in the bar

I lift up my mint julep

and tell him, "I'm good."