It's Portrait Time!

So I was in a conversation at a bar with a chick

I asked her what she had planned for tomorrow

she told me she was going to take a family portrait for her mom

I laughed and asked her if getting hammered the night before a portrait was a good idea


she told me she didn't give a fuck

I told her that I've taken three professional pictures in my life

one with my family as a gift to our parents:age 17

another was my graduation picture: age 18

and the last one was a joke portrait with my pals from work: age 30 something

I went on to explain I was hung over in all three of these portraits

I had very little sleep and had bags under my eyes in all of them

I went on to explain that although I look terrible,

I am at least consistent 

and future generations will think that I just look like that

if I ever take another professional picture

and get a good night's sleep rather than drink it away

people are going to think I probably had a face lift

I kid, the damage has already been done