The Undertaker Incident

So, the week of Wrestlemania this year

I found myself in beautiful, downtown San Antonio

I had been to a few speakeasies with my old pals, Travis and Jordan

I was in a pretty good mood by the time we came to the square


the square is where the Alamo is at

there's also a Ripley's believe it or not

and a wax museum

to advertise the wax museum, there are a few wax statues placed in the window to attract visitors

as we're walking by the musem

I notice that there's a wax statue of John Cena

he's not facing out to the street

rather, into the museum itself

so, he had his back to me so to speak

I was pretty sauced since it was well after midnight

I decided to entertain myself

I broke from the pack and ran up to the window screaming, "It's John Cena!"

I ran right up to the window

placing my hands on the window like a child 

I started to bang on it

shouting, "Cena!" "Cena!"

trying to get this wax statue to turn around

then I noticed adjacent to Cena was the Undertaker

I said,"oooooo, it's Taker, fuck you Cena."

so, I proceeded to run to the window where Undertaker was

Taker's back was also to me

I did the same thing to him

I had both hands on the window

then I started to bang on the window and shout, "Taker! Undertaker!"

the museum had long been closed

but, because of all this noise I was making

an attendant that I was not expecting came out of the back to see what was causing all of this

he caught me with my hands on the window shouting at this fake statue

I was just dicking around and not counting on anyone to be inside

so I stared back at the attendant and I mouthed silently while pointing at the statue

"It's the Undertaker."

he mouthed back to me from inside without skipping a beat

"It's wax."

I can't describe how much I cracked up

I'll never know if he thought I was serious

but he's got a pretty good answer to "how was your day at work?"