You're Standing Before Two Different Doors...

So Carrie is out of the Army

her four years came and went

Her Husband Tyler is out as well this month

Carrie's baby, my Goddaughter is about three months old

right now they live in Kileen Tx

and they are a quaint nice family with quite time for the baby

Now picture a blues bar deep on the east side of Austin TX

that's the bad part of town

but this place is jumping with the blues

the bar is called TC's and they have live blues every monday night

it's one of the few places I've seen where the dance floor is packed more than the bar side of the place

I got invited by none other than Mer one night

so let me explain this bar

it's old,dark,dirty,scary and fun as hell

when I first went I was hella early

the owners were all old black people

I felt like I was the only one at a wedding reception while everyone was still at the church

the killer is they let you bring your own bottle

they sell the cokes for about a buck

if everyone pitches in you can buy a decent size bottle and drink for about a dollar

it doesn't hurt that I'm heavy into this particular brand of rum called Sailor Jerry's

I bought and killed three of these bottles in one week

also the people that own the bar cook and serve it for free

the clientele for this bar are young white college kids

it's funny, all these white kids jumping and bopping to the blues

the first night there I was dancing with Mer

when I went to go sit down I heard someone shout my name

when I looked to see who it was it was Kurt Johnston

he was the weekend weather guy

it was him on weather, super duper as the anchor and Daniel Holdege on sports

so he joined us and we had one hell of a night

that led me buying and killing four bottles of Sailor Jerry's

so here's the problem

I'm getting a little worried about the rate at these bottles get bought and killed

I try to tell myself that I've slowed down, which I have

I really really have slowed down a great deal

the thing is that that monster is still inside and can still come out

even now

it's not hard at all for me to still out drink, out play, and out last all these suckas around me

even in this slowed down period

I love going to this blues bar but I've made arrangements for me to drive to Kileen on Mondays and watch Monday NIght Raw with the Bogart family

I reckon it's about time to get back into wrestling since Mania season is around the corner

and I want to get to know my GodDaughter

you know develop a bond with her

and this is better for me

but I'm not done with this blues bar

I'll be back

with that said I've got a great story about the time I took my brother Erick and Beautiful Bobby:

when we get there the place is packed

so we park on the street

while crossing, a car comes veering around a corner and actually speeds up when he sees us in the middle of the street

we all run like hell and the car even swerves it seems to try to hit us

Erick drops his keys in the road and actually stops to grab them

we're all yelling as he grabs them and the car speeds past

turns out they were cops

we get inside and the place is jumping

I see Kurt and I say hello

Kurt is wasted and slurring

while talking to me he hits my cup and spills a full drink all over the floor

my crew sees this and give me hell all night about spilling my drink

I keep telling them I didn't and that it was Kurt over and over again

so we finally get a table and while talking I hit my glass and spill a full drink on me

"Ok,that one was my fault this time."

we sit next to a nice black lady named Claire

she tells us how much she loves this place

during last call a black man clearing the table asks me for a shot from my bottle

I give him one

he continues on but before he walks away he turns to me and says, "that's alright! Say man what is that?"

I tell him, "Sailor Jerry's. Yeah it's good, I should know, I'm wearing it."

on the way out I see more people that I know

then Erick tells us he lost his keys

I tell whoever i'm talking to goodbye because we're on the bad side of town late at night, drunk and stranded now

I tell here this is gonna be a long night

so now we're where the cops almost ran us over looking for the keys

there's all kinds of drug dealers and bums looking too

so now it's a race find the keys before the bums do

just then that nice lady Claire comes over to us and asks us what we were looking for

we tell her the keys and she pulls them out of her pocket

so we just assume she pick pocketed erick somehow

when we're leaving some guy asks if we want to buy some hydro

rube and erick bite

me and Bobby are in the car now talking about this night's highlights

and I point out that at this point of the story we're in the middle of a drug deal

so Rube opens the door and asks me if I have any money

I tell him 20 dollars

he asks the guy what does he have for 20 dollars

the dude says, "I'll give ya something for 20 dollars"

so he hands them a little baggie and we drive off

Erick opens it and says," man, it's grass."

and I say,"you mean it's not hydro?"

he says" no, it's grass like you mow your grass, grass."

they gave this guy 20 of my monies for fucking actual grass

well the guy did say "I'll give ya something for 20 dollars"